Back to the PORCH

Thank you for your wonderful responses to the Blog about PORCHES. I know it’s been a while since I received so many positive, interesting, fun, great stories and comments. I hope we haven’t “lost steam.”  But it seems as though many of us have had similar feelings about the loss of something (or at least the lessening of it)… of conversations. Of real, face-to-face conversations.  Many have expressed the feeling that we’ve lost something in our communication with each other – in our families, among friends and neighbors, and even with ourselves and our Heavenly Father.

Our world has become increasingly fast-paced, and we seem to search for easier, short-cut ways of sending and receiving messages.  Kind of like “10-second, ‘no-frills’” communication.  Skip this getting acquainted and building trust and relationships stuff … “cut to the chase!”  It seems like we act as if “real” conversations get in the way of efficiency and speed.  We’re so used to (and demanding of) fast food, fast service, fast lanes, fast oil changes and internet speed and service at the bank and post office … and so on (and on and on) that we want our connections with people to be that way too. But relationships don’t grow very deep from the “hit-and-run” method, do they.

I guess the funeral for my nephew has me thinking again about relationships. I’ve known him his whole life, and we’ve had some unforgettable conversations.  I wish there had been more, and yet I’m not expressing regret – even when we couldn’t be on a porch together we sent notes back and forth. Having him gone (temporarily, thanks to the light and truth which God has given us) has caused me to ponder on relationships with those who are still here.

One of my frustrations is that as earthlings we have to measure time. We all get only 24 hours each day. Donald Trump doesn’t get any more time in a day than Sukiman in Indonesia or you wherever you are. Researchers have discovered that the following people had or have exactly the same amount of time in every day: Albert Einstein, the worker at the drive-up window at Chick Fil ‘A, Mahatma Gandhi, Yahn Yahnsen in Wisconsin (surely some of you know the song…??), the child who lives near the Bering Sea in Alaska, the newest baby on the planet, the CEO of Spudnuts, Howard Hughes, Johnny Linggo, Steve Jobs, Dr. Zhivago , Brigham Young, Nancy Drew, Sheri Dew, Marco Polo, Queen Elizabeth, or anyone else currently alive or about to arrive. We ALL have just 24 hours per day. And I have the courage to be concerned about the lack of conversation . . . .

Part of what I try to do – feel a need to do – is to “go porching” to those whom I most want to have long conversations with. I guess we’ve all discovered that it’s so hard to fit everyone and everything in to the minutes of the day (especially when time really does fly on wings of lightning!!).  I’ve found that some people seem “un-porchable” … they can’t seem to settle down and just T-A-L-K… And honestly, I find myself being that way too – kind of “fidgety” and semi-responsive to a nice “porcher” who just wants to have a good, long visit.

Satisfying conversations with others are kind of like sunshine and water to plants – they help the roots of friendship and caring sink deeply and grow stronger and stronger.  And that’s one of the main reasons I worry about the disappearance of porches, and the lack of use of the porches which have somehow survived the tragedy.  One thing I loved SO much in the many comments I’ve received is reading about memories – you’ve brought back additional memories to me just by sharing some of your favorite porch moments, porch experiences.  Let’s keep it up. Let’s share ideas with each other. I’ll do my best to quit being so absent on the Blog … I miss the chance to be in touch and hope I can get back to my initial “habit” of posting almost every day.  I think of things every day … I’m just not always able to post (I don’t have time, or I don’t have internet…).  Pease hang in there with mee – I really appreciate our little community, our “porch-rich” community, and I thank you for stopping by.  And by the way, I apologize that I don’t always get around to responding to comments – I do in my heart, but I know not everyone can read my heart or my mind.  Thanks so much!!  With love, MEE


13 thoughts on “Back to the PORCH

  1. Oh Mee…this is porching. We can come and sit on your “porch” and chat with you. I’m introverted, so porching is perfect for me. I’d rather sit on a porch than go to a party any. day.

    My grandma Smith had a bunch of old metal chairs under her “Granny Smith apple tree” in her backyard in Champaign, Il. I remember all the family going there for an outside picnic. Blankets and quilts were laid all over under that big old tree. She died when I was 8 years old. I sure missed those perfect evenings listening to the adults chatter away and us kids playing tag or hide and seek for hours. Ohhhh…the corn on the cob. Yum!

    Just Lindy

  2. Love visiting on MEE’s porch. Your love shines through the things you choose to post here even if you can’t respond to all my lengthy comments. I think it’s amazing that you actually take the time to read them all, let alone comment back when you can. Time…..such a bother. How very generous of you to spend so much of your time with all of us on this “blog-porch” of yours. Thanks for making me feel so welcome on MEE’s porch. Love, JK

  3. There’s a FB page called Friday Night Meatballs that promotes the idea of having a standing, Friday night dinner invitation to those in our neighborhoods that can come. I tried it this past summer at my summer residence. It was wonderful. Every Friday night my siblings and extended family got together. My 15 year old nephew looked forward to our dinners and always brought the garlic bread. Our family ties grew quite strong. Just another idea of how to porch.

  4. This last Saturday Ruth, Anita, Christina, and myself went to a quilt show in Aurora, Oregon. Great conversation happened as we traveled there. We loved looking in all the first settlement buildings at quilts and goodies. The best part of the trip was sitting on a bench on the front porch of a cabin and porching! Time was never thought about as we laughed and giggled and shared our thoughts and ideas. As I enjoyed that porching experience I could see MEE giving us a thumbs up.
    Thank you for bring back so many memories that had been carefully stored away.
    Porching is the best past time in the world and the most enlightening!

  5. Just Lindy, my grandparents also had old metal chairs, but they rocked and were always in the front yard in Oklahoma where the paper was delivered in the evening and grandpa sat there each day waiting for the paper and talking with neighbors. We were lucky children as we spent entire summers with our grandparents. Another thing on their porch was a large water can with one metal cup that all the neighborhood children drank out of (I know MEE as a nurse you’re cringing about now, but we never got sick.) A fond memory of the water can is going to the ice house each day with grandpa to get the ice for the can. Good memories.

  6. As I was reading this follow-up to the porching issue, I realised that for a group of my friends and I, our monthly Girls’ Night Out activities serve as porch time for us. We had one last night, and when we were finished with supper, we chatted, and chatted. Finally, at 10 (we meet at 7), we started murmuring about needing to go home, and then we chatted and chatted some more . . . until 11:30 (definitely past my bedtime!). I’ve been doing GNOs with these ladies for many years, and while our group is by no means exclusive (hey! next time you’re in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, we’ll have to make sure you can come to one! *wink*), there’s something special about the group of the 4 of us that were there last night. These are ladies that I’ve known for well over a decade, and there’s a level of openness and honesty in those relationships we’ve formed with each other that is just lovely!

    • I loved reading about your “porching” at your GNO … what a terrific idea! I DID come to Edmonton once for a “Know Your Religion” evening. I got to go to your beautiful Temple! (And also spent a few minutes looking in that HUGE mall!). It sure was cold, but I loved my visit!

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